Society perpetuates this lie that we should have body acceptance. AndI believed that because I was the one who needed to find a whole lot of acceptance of my unhealthy habits. I prefer to view it more as practicing self love. We have to get to a point where we love ourselves – deep to our core. And the truth is BECAUSE I love myself, I WANT to be healthy.
In June 2013, I was unhappy, unhealthy, and while other areas of my life were falling (or had fallen) into place, this was a huge area of my life that I had chosen to neglect. Battling weight your entire life is not fun and frankly, it’s exhausting. Especially when you spend most of your time complaining about it and not actually doing anything to change it. I’ve had gym memberships, bought fancy running shoes and signed up and never ran a variety of races.
Last summer (after that picture), I experienced some health issues that caused me to lose some weight, but also begin the process of re-evaluating life choices. In the months that followed, I never made conscious decisions about it, but after a job-change and life becoming busy, some more weight came off.
Around Thanksgiving, I began to talk with Jim about getting a treadmill for the house. He could use it for training, but more importantly, I could use it and I would have ZERO excuse to not get on it. The weather wouldn’t be a factor, I would just have to make TIME to do it. Period. After going back and forth, we ordered the treadmill and my Christmas gift arrived December 9th. Within the hour, Jim put it together and I ran my first mile. I haven’t looked back ever since. I’ve run/walked over 80 miles, over 20 hours, and I cannot even begin to discuss the change that has happened.
I no longer focus on the scale – sure I weigh-in weekly, but the number is no longer my focus because I FEEL amazing. I haven’t had soda – pop – Coke since I started on December 9th (despite desperate cravings on Christmas Day). I have run through sickness, my period, holidays and through “just not feeling it.” If you know anything about me, then those alone are a HUGE step. Gone are the HUGE sugary coffee drinks. If they can’t make it light, I don’t drink it and even still, it’s a once a week treat. Water is my best friend and green juice/smoothies are putting a spring in my step. The decision to make one positive change (for me, getting active and moving) has made a world of difference.
Weight Loss since “official” start (December 9th): 10 pounds
Weight Loss since June 2013: 29 pounds
Honestly? It’s still very hard. But I keep thinking how very unhappy I was being fat and inactive.
And for the first time, at 31 years old, I truly feel alive.